As the ‘gift’ is given

I am not pleased with the need to focus conscious thought so as to not allow the mindset of popular coined sayings, mindless mental habit, and present or past circumstance . . . to steal, rob, and destroy the joy of the ‘present’. ‘Different Day, Same S--- ' . . . You know the sayings . . . The thought now is; to be conscious, aware, and proactive . . . not operate from a numb, drone like, automated response or reaction to the seeming dislike for the ‘present’. When a 'gift' is given and received to someone with an expectation of a particular or specific 'gift', there is a detailed facial expression. Expectation . . . The moment that the receiver’s expectation is not met there is a physical reaction in the facial features. An expression on the face feeds the giver immediate detailed information about the receiver’s internal response.

Facial expressions are nonverbal communication. The role of facial expressions in person-to-person interactions provides commentary and illustration about verbal communications. Expressions provide another mode for understanding the private, hidden side of the inner person, a side that may not be accessible in the form of verbalization.

Many relationships begin from the image above. There is an immediate expectation that the on-looker has despite the absence of person-to-person communication. Why do we continue in relationships that consist of the image, and the image alone . . .? Besides the obvious . . . Why do we continue in relationships that have no visible feet to walk, no arms, no hands, no head, no brain, no mouth, no lips, no eyes, no heart . . .

I was inspired by a blog that had this photograph in the heading. The name of the piece is; Why Do Men Love Assets - By Zettler Clay. The read was not especially thought provoking. It was interesting to see all the comments the writer received. I was focused on the photo and its lack of any other physical attributes. I have been hard pressed to complete the thoughts that go along with this topic. I care for my Dad. He has dementia. I began this post sitting in the backyard, on a particular sunny morning/afternoon, (in the city,SF) disturbed by the fact that I was not able to accept the 'gift' of the 'present' . . . I strongly believe that the depression of that moment was not enough to foreshadow the fact that again, I, am the recipient of the 'present' . . . I know that by mere observation that there was not a soul that could attest to the fact that I am again the recipient of any 'gift', let alone the 'gift' of 'life' . . . That morning has relevance to me. It is the time that conscious thought became outward expression . . . accepting the 'opportunity' . . . 'looking' at 'now' . . . , and accepting 'it', 'today', as a 'gift' as it was intended to be received ! I was more upset with my focus, or lack thereof, than similar moments in times past. The effort that was needed to focus on other than 'yesterday's' events, and 'tomorrows' desires was compelling me, I struggled . . . I began to feel anger, deep down within . . . I had to fight with it . . . I was immersed in that feeling/emotion for a good part of the rest of that day. I can now, as I write, still taste that struggle . . . I have come to fight against the mindset that was so pronounced that day. I had to fight to not give my disposition to the; 'Different Day, Same S---' attitude . . . I have to remove the .exe program for that set of thoughts, and delete the fragmented files and programs, and correct/repair the file permissions. . . (Yea, Mac & Windows user) I needed to rewrite that program to execute: Different Day, Same 'Gift'.exe . . .

What we see when we look at what we want/like has a different set of processes that result, in a completely different operating system, exacting programs that have a completely different purpose, and all together different set of goals . . . I speak of the thought immediately after the eye focuses and transmits the image to the brain. A screen capture of the neurons firing and a caption come to mind . . . (Maybe another T-Shirt . . .!) A child's face on Christmas/Birthday anticipating receiving a ‘gift’ . . . The satisfaction on a face that 'is' receiving the very thing he/she wanted or desired . . . Imagine God, or any person looking at the facial expression I emitted this particular day. As I awoke to the 'gift' of the 'present' and He sees less than what a child's face produces on any 'gift' 'receiving' occasion . . . Or, the look on a face that has achieved or meet with considerable satisfaction some thing, some goal, or a specific expectation . . . How terrible is that, to so dislike the 'present' that you have it written all over your face, first thing in the morning . . . How cool would it be to be a cheerful recipient of this 'present' like a child on Christmas Day . . . Glad . . . Excited . . . Ready . . . Willing . . . Able . . .

When we are looking at what we want there is a specific, discerning look on our face. When I next look at the 'gift' of the day, the 'present', I want my expression to exclusively exude, Gratefulness, Joy, love, Grace, Mercy . . .